—From CB—

It’s certainly not my only news source, but I regularly tune into Google News to get a broad sense of what’s “trending” for my fellow Americans. At odd times, for no clear reason, I get the Google news feed focused on Nigeria or Peru instead, and it’s nice to know that (a) we in the U.S. aren’t the center of the universe and (b) that other countries can be as vile as us.

But my focus goes today not to the President’s nose hairs but to Entertainment. That’s the news section that ostensibly covers what I’ve devoted my life to. Of course there’s no “theatre” section, and while the NY Times still lumps it under “Arts and Culture,” Google (along with most newspapers) simply says “Entertainment,” meaning, I guess, any human activity that doesn’t involve mass murder, and some that do.

This past week, Entertainment has been comprised of—

ICE Arrests Rapper 21 Savage
Actor Jussie Smollett Calls Himself the “Gay Tupac”
Bow Wow Starts Talking Football
Cardi B and Husband Offset Together after Reconciliation
Kylie Jenner Responds after Teasing Baby #2 with Travis Scott
Bethenny Frankel Makes X-Rated Comment about Pete Davidson
Beatles’ PreBreakup Letters on Sale for $550,000
How to Stream the Puppy Bowl and Kitten Bowl
Here’s What You Can Expect in This Year’s Super Bowl Ads
Vote for Your Favorite Super Bowl Commercial
Meghan Markle Hires her own Birthing Partner
Tekashi 6ix9ine’s New Name on Twitter is “Snitch9ine”
Jerry Seinfeld Sued over Sale of $1.5 Million Porsche
Fiji Water Girl Is Suing Fiji Water
Gisele Bundchen Reveals Why She Broke Up with Leonardo DiCaprio
Lily Aldridge Gives Birth to Baby No. 2
Ariana Grande Is Totally Over Her Tattoo Debacle
Anna Kendrick Tweeted Thanks to Hospital Staff
Demi Lovato Quits Twitter after 21 Savage Backlash

I must remark that no mention was made of which adolescent movie topped the box office charts, and nothing on the Kardashians. They must be slipping. Perhaps they’re all writing poetry.

And I’m curious how you take a curtain call after your breakup, your lawsuit, your childbirth, your tweet, or your tattoo debacle. They never taught that in acting class.

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